Thursday, October 29, 2009

is love alive?

i read this in Dirah's blog and it got to me. Is LOVE really alive?

it scares me sometimes to even think of it?

i've heard someone saying that love fades (really?OMG!), but isn't there a way to un-fade it? to keep the fire, the spark burning? to keep it lasting? is there any elixir ? any way at all?

but how true is so if we haven't tried our very best?

sometimes out of ego and selfishness, we ignore all this in hope of the best (or worst).

sometimes we fear the worst and push aside the good. i've seen that all, i've even experienced it. maybe i'm even doing it.

fear of rejection, fear of losing, fear of being unloved, fear of depression, fear of heartbroken, fear of all things possible. don't we all have it? i know we should all manage it, but please, don't tell me when you're happily laughing at his jokes, looking into his eyes, and the feeling's all right, there was a moment you'd think if any of this could be forever and suddenly poof! its gone.

i'm as scared as you are. i'm scared of making the same mistakes, having cried endless nights, having puffy eyes for weeks, again and again and again. i know you don't want it either. but if fear is tearing us apart when you know deep down in your heart and soul that we've always loved each other,and we will always be, then what's the point of letting fear take us down?

but it can't be worked alone does it? i mean all these bullscrap?

maybe all we need is to lower down our ego in sync with the loved one and remind ourselves of how we fell in love, once upon a time and how we've always loved and needed each other, the good and happy times, the bad ones we've overcome. or perhaps since the day u were born, when all this started (i'm not particularly referring to only bf-gf love but all sorts). shouldn't we be doing that?

how did the couples whom lasted forever? the ones who lasted over 20-30 years? tell me. someone. please

My current headline says

"some say love's a river,
some say love's a silly song,
some say love's all around us,
it lifts us up where we belong.
some say love's hearing laughter in the rain
but we all know love is pain"

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

My current headline says

"you can't move a whole mountain, but you could cut it into pieces and put it back together again"

Miss Cappucine

Last weekend while being away on some weekend runaway i might call it, a lovely lady shared with me this clip and i was smiling all the way with her version of Winnie the Pooh

Ladies and gentlemen, please give a round of applause to Miss Cappucine. Oh yes, she's French.

Cute isn't she? The way she talks, her big eyes, oh-so -cute! And whats with me and kids. infants, kanak-kanak ribena? i don't know.. is that a sign? is that a plane? Nooooo.... its just me crapping.

Oh and please jangan lupa tengok the other clip of hers where she acts soooooooo naughty. Enjoy!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Sesak nafas.
Gusi bengkak.
Sore throat and temperature.
Missing someone badly.
Could all this be so bad? Am i asking for too much? or i'm just plain paranoid? Is this a problem or a hiccup? Should i be calm? Should i worry much? Is he insecured or are we both? What is all this? How do i overcome it? Are we rushing? Am i pushy? Do i not love you enough? What is all this? What have we become? Overly-protective?

Jom jemaah and mintak petunjuk, nak tak?
Here's the best part which touched me when i watched the movie up. So sweet. It shows the days they had together from they were married till they have lost one another. omygoodness. if it doesnt move you, i dont know what u're made of

Friday, October 9, 2009

Who will i fall for?

hmm....its so cliche when i took a quiz on FB and i dont knw how far its true and real but it just surprised me. Here's the prediction...

Adura took Who will you fall for?
Someone you've been with beforeYou have been with this man/woman one time or another. Your relationship fell a part or you just had a falling out. It wasnt a bad break-up. You guys will meet up again and fall madly in love with each other once more, but with better results.

Thursday, October 8, 2009


source: images from

Meet blur blur, my new love... :) This was the gift i got from Mr Mystery's family. perhaps at times i'm just like blur blur, so blur. I had this in 12inch blurblur, baby blurblur and a keychain blurblur :) Welcome blurblur, i'll always love you. Let's hope to adopt your other 20-something siblings from cos i just love them all.
BlurBlur seat GrrrGrr!

25 tahun sudah... (part kedua)

It was 27th sept. 2009 which marked me being a year older, wiser, maybe, maybe not. But it's supposed to be my day. so here are a few great things that happened. Let's start from early morning alright, the moment i woke up.


I woke up beside my love,....... the blurblur doll, i got as a pressie (haaa...mesti uolls ingat i woke up beside ehem2 tau. tak baik pikir bukan2 tauuuu, kitorg kawan jeee...!) in my pretty pink pyjama and i woke up with a smile. What a day to start :) and there it is tonnes of SMS-es and i love the one from Mama. She was so sweet (Ma, I LOVE U!).

The first thing that got to my mind was to call Mr.Mystery so he could fetch me for breakfast. We planned on having breakfast with his family. But due to over-exhaustion, (adekah perkataan sedemikian? any word as such?) i bet no one would be awake so early to prepare breakfast. And so he came and we bought Roti Canai and Nasi Lemak, the proud staple breakfast of Malaysians somewhere around TTDI Jaya. Filling and fattening, i must say.

As we had breakfast together, my first wish for the day was:
I wish i had many,many more happy and joyful mornings amongst loved ones; family and (insyaAllah) future family. Aminnnnn!


By noon, everyone had their water bottle filled with Ribena and "iced water with lots of ice cubes please *****," for me, as i bat my long curly eyelashes (over tau!) to tapau us for the long journey back from KL-Melaka-Penang. Wait! "Nak jalan round KL pun kene tapau ke akak*?"(Akak bukan nama sebenar) but it's a good thing anyways, cos takde la huru-hara sekampung if you happen to get stuck in the ever-famous KL massive traffic jams withnothing to eat or drink and worst still if you need to use the ladies. Seksa gila i tell you! Tahan la sampai nampak signboard petrol station.

So back to the story, when i meant US, i was referring to duhh! (do i have to repeat it again?) Mr Mystery was also going back to Penang, one reason was to accompany me cos i had to drive alone, but since when I'm so dependent? Hmm, give me a break! Kadang-kadang nak jugak bermanja and have someone to be in-charge and to get some TLC (tender,loving,care) , right?After all today's my day as quoted by Mr Mystery.

Eventually, our plan got changed as i overheard the conversation between them sisters about going to Pavillion. I was not eavesdropping or pasang telinga and such tapi ape lagi nyah tak tahan telinga mendengar, harus pergi okayy! And again while bating my eyelashes i asked "We're not rushing kan,*****?" and i got a big smile and a big YES! Woohoo!

my 2nd wish for the day:
He's just so sweet today i hope he's sweet everyday! *di sini saya rumuskan sahaja serta diselitkan beberapa lagi wish berkenaan Mr Mystery yang mungkin tidak wajib dipertontonkan. Terima Kasih*


We were still in Pavillion after our superbly-licious lunch at the Teppanyaki joint at the Basement Food Court (Ade ke food court lain?). It seemed like everything was going against me, including the chef. I was the last to get my Salmon Teppanyaki and my taugeh and sayur was so sikit compared to my sis and Mr Mystery's. No fair! I know i eat lesser than them even i'm BIGGER than them (ye, saya mengaku di sini I'm bigger :) but that does not mean you should be discriminating me and join the forces so i should diet you know?!

And so, after lunch and not much touring around or window shopping and such as i find it so blah and un-interesting perhaps i had the "jewel" in my hand (definitely not a diamond,engagement ring lah) who means more than anything as what Pavillion has to offer or perhaps i just had to stick to my budget and purchase things i NEED instead of those I WANT (another resolution in being a year wiser). OMG, did i really said it out loud? Shopping and Mr Mystery? Really? Macam dalam movie Shopaholic Diaries plak when all the patung-patung mannequins were talking to her and seducing her to buy, buy and buy!

Papa called me at about 1630, at first i "merajuk" cos Pa did not call or SMS-ed and wished for my birthday. Perhaps he forgotten, but he didn't cos Papa called me on my birth time. How sweet is that? *wiping a tear*

my 3rd wish for the day: "you're not a diamond in my heart, because diamonds make me happy for less than 24hours. You're much better than that!" Adura's quote


At this point of day, i was contented with every second i had, even when not all my family was around somehow i was still among my family, my sister. I, later, visited or more like pergi Beraya at my Aunty Nor's house located in Desa Pinggiran Putra, Kajang/Putrajaya. All these while, whenever i feel like going there, i would always lose my way even with the help of a GPS (or perhaps i didn't read it right?). Don't blame me for being bad with directions, i'm not but Putrajaya is just not my forte. So this time, i called my Aunty Nor to fetch us and guide us the way from the Putrajaya International Convention Centre (PICC) or "cowboy hat" as what my niece Anis would call it. InsyaAllah i'll have no trouble going there again since Mr Mystery seemed to concentrate, study, and copy+save the way there into his "memory card". Lucky me!

Actually we went there not to only visit my family but as well as to welcome our new family member Mr Muaz Azwan who was born on the 1st Syawal, 20th September 2009. Like the Malay saying "sambil menyelam, minum air". Did i get that right? Hopefully :) I got him a bag full of blue goodies, was excited to give it to him as i thought its one of my personal favourite baby gifts (mind the self-perasanness). It was a blue baby bag with a baby whale and in it was full of baby goodies. I'm so used to buying pink stuffs this year and for a change i had to buy a blur gift and boy i was excited!

Holding Lil Muaz in my arms, made me think and wonder when will i be holding my own baby instead of cousins and friends? *sigh* and i bet i was not the only one thinking as such. Well, enough of the not-so-sad story, it's supposed to be a happy entry people!

Bak kata orang melayu or simpulan bahasa "langkah kanan" or fortunate, i was, as Aunty Nor prepared such an array of food. It seemed to me like a party. Laksa, kuih raya, cakes and cupcakes, i just loved them all. Ishbir just enchants me when he sang me three rounds of the Birthday song with some extra hip shaking. It was all good.

But we had to go so soon since it was running late and "someone" had been so mind-boggling about going back to Malacca. Her initial plan was to return to Malacca with her friends and eventually her friend wanted to return the next day. And the notification came in so late in the evening i felt like a time bomb since I've well-planned my journey earlier on. Since it was a joyful day to be ruined by some mishaps, being the ever-so-loving sister, somehow made sure she returned to campus safely.

My 4th wish for the day:
"God give me patience and perseverance. Give me love, hope and faith. Give me all the good deeds and traits i should and make me in being a better Muslim, daughter, sister, friend, insyaAllah wife and mother. Dan semoga aku bertemu jodoh yang beriman dan bertanggungjawab sebagai seorang Muslim serta dikekalkan bersamanya dunia dan akhirat kelak. Amin".


This time of day, we just left UiTM Lendu, Malacca and heading back north. Problem was, it's 9pm and my tummy is grumbling and i bet the person behind the wheel is too. So we need to stop somewhere, grab a quick bite then go. I need to reach home soon as i need to be with my family on my birthday, too, you know? :) Can we make it on time? Will they still be awake? Let's just hope so, ok?

Throughout the long journey, apart from our passion for speed, it was all fun and full of singing and laughter. We were practically helping each other from sleeping and snoring. Perhaps, exhausted after a whole long day and lack of sleep throughout the weekend (refer 0800). Spare the details, i was just so happy. Happy to know that i had someone who celebrated with me for almost 24hours on my birthday. What better gift would i ask for?

My 5th wish for the day:
"It feels good to have meals with you. I wish i could have breakfast lunch and dinner with you everyday even if i was not the one preparing it myself. And God, make me a less "super pemalas" person so i could watch and learn how to cook and prepare food for my loved ones. Amin"

28th Sept 2009


We drove across the Penang bridge, and reached home safely, finally. Exhausted and sleepy we were and sad to be apart. But, i was still smiling. Because, i'm going home to my family whom i'm hoping would be still awake and the fact that i had 3 more days extra to spend with Mr Mystey. A week with him, seriously is the longest duration i'd be with him ever, to date (now i'm telling you how much i hate Long Distance R'ship).

When i reached home, my parents were still awake and i had a very big smile on my face. I just felt so lucky. What better gift would i need for my birthday?

My last birthday wish:
None. All i could utter was "Alhamdullilah". I just felt blissed amongst my sayangnesses, so people, please don't pop that bubble now.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Beyonce Junior

Found this while i was browsing through Youtube and found this little talent. Reminds me so much of me when i was a kid. Hopefully, i'll have the chance to record my babygirl like this. Haha! So entertaining how hard she worked this vid. Enjoy girls!